kisah paling kelakar tahun ini.....

pada satu hari di meebo...

A : awak, jom la kta berbuka poser samer2
me : no problemo.... hehee....sy nk mkn bnyk2...suruh azam belanja...
B : ok je....kta suruh azam belanja....nasik beriyani nak?
me : nakkkk! nak 3! azam, ko belanja eh?
azam : zzzzzzzzz....

dat was d conversation i had with my dearst ex divisionmate back in my previous office in putrajaya.... how i miss them dearly....penghibur hati di kala duka, marah, bengang....teman gosip ketika duka, marah bengang....seriously, i managed to survive in icu all those years for having a team like them...

so, back to d story.....as planned, and as expected, si azam xdpt dtg...ntah apa la alasan dier...so, off i went to putrajaya with such a big grin on my face to meet the other two....miss them so much....miss the talks, the laughs, the rebellion and so much more...

as planned, i arrived at putrajaya a few minutes before asr. so i did my asr prayer at A's house and then we left to pick B up at her House...and, as anticipated, all the journey to B's house were filled with laughter and gossips.....

as planned, we went to dis one cool looking restaurant nearby a lake sumwhere in putrajaya (i wudnt reccoemend another iftar there)
and all we did was talking & gossipping abt dis bos, dat bos....and of course, they did tell me how they felt abt my successor who is currently giving them a hard time....truth is, i do feel bad abt dis....before i left, i made it clear to d person who's handling the human resource division...i told them my successor must be able to adapt well to my friends....but, we can only plan.....God decides....

while we were talking and gossipping, we realised dat it was already 7.15pm and all the people in d cafe were so busy filling their plates with either rice, lamb and so many other food....my mind was, whut the heck...buffet what.....im sure the food will be restocked when its finished...well, how WRONG was i ...... i broke my fast with a curry puff & a glass of orange juice and off i went to perform my maghrib prayer...well, my plan was dat pray first and eat & talk all d way till midnight.....

when i have performed my maghrib prayer, i quickly went to d lamb grilled stall...huhuuu....yang tinggal cuma beberapa keping kambing sahaja.....i put a few pieces on my plate and began eating.....sedap la jugak......and i told B abt it....B assured me dat the management of d cafe has committed dat they will restock d food all the way till 9 pm......how wrong they were!!!
they didnt restock! nasik habis, lauk2 habis...kuetiaw pun habis....so, yg tinggal was laksa & mi kari....so, dat was my food dat day...kambing 2 ketul yg kecil and laksa.....haii....tkpela......syukur2....

after our not so great iftar, we continued talking and laughing and gossipping all d way till it was already 10.30pm....so i quickly sent both of them back home and off i went to my dearest friend for a night.....( u see, my dad didnt want me to drive home dat nite..he insisted i shud sleep in putrajaya...he was worried abt me driving home late in d night...haiyaaaaaaaaaaaaa....bukan sebelum ni dh berpuluh kali ke aku blk tengah2 mlm frm putrajaya??ikot je la)

when i arrived at an's house, it was already 11.15...after perfoming my isya' we chatted till it was 12.15 am....well, banyak btol aku berckp harini...well, whut can i dO...i love talking to my close friends...i did mention to her dat i must leave her house at 6.30 d next day, considering d fact dat my office is in d heart of kl...i must leave early or risk being stucked in a massive traffic jam en route to kl...

at 5 am, i woke up and realised dat an was preparing d food for sahur...i helped a bit and we had our sahur till it was already subuh...
we continued chatting till it was 6.21 (whut ever happened to the "leave at 6.30?")
so i quickly took my bath and get ready...i did my make up...and walllahhh im all ready to go (which is kinda weird coz i usually took more than 30 minutes to get ready)...it was 6.45 and im all ready to leave for work.....as i picked my bags to approach d door while calling an it was time for me to leave....i realised dat......TAK SOLAT SUBUH LAGI!!!!!
haruslah aku cuci mekap, solat and bersiap semula....huwaaaaaaaaaaaa...dis time around, no mekap2 dah....IM LATE.....

en route to kl, i set my gps to my office address....how was i to know dat d gps wud point me the direction through sg.besi yg jam terokkkkkkkkkkkkk.....huwaaaaa...when i arrived, it was already 8.27...well, i was soooooo lucky my boss was absent so i managed to park my car in her parking spot....

lesson learnt from dis such incident is dat, if u love to gossip, dont do it on sunday....especially if ur travelling all d way from putrajaya!!!!!!!

takde kawan :(

uhuk2.....aku sgt2 lapar.....tp, xde kawan nak makaN.....how sO?

okie, dis is my 3rd office dis year....and, nO, i dnt have any trouble with anyone/anything with my previous office....its jus dat....haiii....gomen punya citerr...only gomen yg akan fahaM.....plus, i dont want to explain it all out in here...coz, who knows who's reading dis bloG, although the probability is almost zerO, its better to be safe than sorrY.....

so, dis is my 3rd office.....aku rsa aku ni peramah...i smile to almost everyoNe...tp, kenapa aku still xde kawan nk lunch? :(

dlu, back in icu, xde pon msalah ni...even if i dnt have anyone to go to d cafe with (coz they were either attending a meeting sumwhere or simply not in d office), i have no probLem to simply go to d cafe right across blok barat and came back less than 15 minutes to enjoy eating in d pantry (which i really2 love)

msa kt bgnan mas pulak, lagi lah xde msalah. although i have no friends to buy lunch with (dnt get me wrong, i do have friends, but when ur located in different levels at d building, susah nk jmpe), i still managed to go down from level 33 to level 2 and simply walk straight to jalan tengah, where they have dis soooooooooo many choices of scrumptuous food (even better than perdana putra)....i will simply go down around 12.30 and enjoy my meals in less than 10 minutes later....weeeee..

but now, in dis new plaCe, it is sooo different....yes, d location is superb.....in d hearts of kl...where d 2 famous river meets.....unlike bangunan mas, which is located in d golden triangle of kl, dis new place is simply almost impossible to get many choices of food! yes, dis building has its own cafe......erkkk....sebenonye, xlayak pangil cafe poN....its soooo smaLL.....nasik selalu habes, lauk sikit...huhuuuuu...yes, ada 2 restoran lain, satu situated exactly next to my office, and another one right accross d busy street (imagine risking ur life for food...exaggerating? a bit) but, derang smer mamak...i dont like mamaK............

dont get me wrong, i love naan.....especially garlic nan, cheese nan...but dat was years agO.....masa kt uia i used to enjoy dat....but now, i dnt see why i juz cant eat it during my lunch hour....maybe coz i used to eat it with friends, not all aloNe!

and yes, there's dis 7-eleven operating just a few steps away...d most nutritious food dat they can offer is sausage bun....which, is simply not enough for my tummy....close friends back in icu used to call me four-tummied-ruminan due to d fact dat i eat a lot.....last week i bought two sausage buns, and it is not enuff! plus, there are so many people waiting for buses there and i am so afraid with the looks on their faces (ok, i might be exagerrating here, but, i dont like it...especially when u r all alone)

huhuuu...lapar....i can always go home and eat, but with the parking problem, its almost impossible to get a free parking spot later when im bacK to d office...

im considering of bringing "bekal" to d office......but, with my lack of dicipline these few months, it is almost impossible...because...

i need to leave home by 6.50 to ensure i arrive office safely around 7.15 (simply for a parking spot, which im struggling nowadays coz i tend to leave house at 7)

dat means, i have to get up early at 5.45 (currently i tend to be eyes wide open at 6.00)

i need almost 1 hour to get ready (praying, bathing, make up)

so, frm 6.00 am to 6.50, there is simply not enuff time for me to prepare bekaL (sumtimes i had to do my make up in d car) and if i want to prepare bekal,i wud have to wake up at least around 5 am to cooK....nak bangun kol 5.45 pon payah... huhuuuuu....and even if i wake up at 5, nk masak apa eh? nasik goreng? sambal tumis?

plus, with d size of my appetite, dat bekal will definitely diminished by 8.30. so, from 10 am untill 5, whut m i going to eat?

susah nye jadi org selalu lapar ni...uhuk2.....haiiii....kurus balik la aku ni :(

anyways, whut abt d other people around here? how did they cope? well, simply by going to those restaurants dat i have explained previously..... and, tadi, my officemate simply hilang xbgtau pon nk gi mana...huhuuu.....sedih....

i miss icu... :(

SOMBONG

me? sombong?

huhuuuuu....adakah aku sombong? ke aku sukar didekati? owhhhh....seriusly...i dont think im sombong.....huhuuuuuu...im one of d most friendly people ever existed in dis world....exaggerating? heheee...maybe? but truly, i despise sombong people, and i truly believe i m not.......

so, when dis one guy told me dat it seems dat im sombong, i was kinda pissed off ( a bit)....

he even mentioned i am not so friendly with my anak2 buah...... hmmmmmm...

okie, i do take critiques positively. it means dat im not defensive....however, i do feel a bit saD...aku dh nak blah baru tau anak2 buah aku terasa dgn aku....but, come again.....whut d heLL...... TAPI....i treated my anak2 buah nicely... i talk slowly, politely with them...aku tak pernah marah2 anak buah aku..... i asked information nicely....and when they cudnt give d answer, i juz smiled and requested them to deliver it soon...i even say thank u for EVERYTHING dat they gave me..... i laughed with them...i even gave my anak buah my textbooks...when my anak buah applied for a leave, i always approved it..so, apa lagi x kenaaaa? when other pengarah disturbed my anak buah, i wud ask them nicely whut happened....i never scolded them...im not perfect...im not an angeL....please respect that....i NEVER complained abt my anak2 buah...i accepted them juz d way they r.....huhuuuu...but y r they judging ME?

dis is ME..... i know my boundaries....yes, i dont eat with my anak buah....but dat DOES NOT mean i dont respect them...... bukan aku berlagak....bukan sbb "eh, ko staf, x layak mkan dgn aku"...NO...so not truE.....i have no problem eating with them....dah orang x ajak? kaN?

plus, msa aku kt tmpt lama, aku makan je dgn anak2 buah aku...xde msalah....i do have my own boudaries, but, apa salahnya? bukan nye aku hina my anak buah...NEVER DID, AND NEVER WOULD...i respect them....i adore them...they r my teachers in kewangan....so whut if i dont share any personal/private stuff with them? TAK BERDOSA PON? kan?

yes, i do have trust issue...back in my previous office...i only trust 6 people...huhuuuu..imagine working there diligently for the past 3 years, and u only find 6 people dat u can truly trust...gheeeeeeeeeeeeeee....i do have a complicated trust issue! well, after ALL that had happened, i have my own reasons as to y i refuse to b close to juz simply anyone from my office...if u had d same experience, im sure u wud do d SAME....

so, y do i care so much abt whut people think abt me?

saya tak sombong lah....owhh....whut d heLL....

my heart wants sumthing dat i cnt finD

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.........haiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.......................

dh ntah berapa kali dh aku mengeluh dlm diam dis few weeks.....dh berapa kali aku dok mengeluh dlm hati...

aku sedih.................sedih sgT...................

my bestrfiend : ala sarah.......try je laaaaa.....mana tau....................

my other guy friend : u bg je lah dier email.....u've got nothing to loose, man!

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm............

biarlah......aku mntak extend for two weekS...aku sja letak 2 weeks...but when i explained it to my tkp......aku ckp la need more time to settle so many tasks....and, in d same time, right on my mind " to have extra time to see him"......

truth is...i dnt think my new soon to be boss will approve d 2 weeks extension.....confirm nxt friday is d last for me.....and....mmg xjmpe dh la kan after dis?

will dis fade away?

it took me almost 1 and a half year to be like dis....to b able 2 smile.....to b able 2 listen to songs dat previously wud brought tears to my cheek.......and now.....haiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii....and aku dh jadi stalker pulak tu kt fb!

haiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.....

biarkan berlalu?

biarkanlah.......

insya Allah, ada hikmah.....

complicated part 2

one fine day...as i was diligently doing my work..concentrating hard with the paper dat i've been working on for the past 1 month, suddenly my M mate appeared out of nowhere right in front of my desk....

me : uishh....terkejot....naper? r u ok?

M mate :(with a serious face, dat i have adapted to..and can interpret well) hmmmm......sy ada bnda nk cakap ni

me : haaa? alamak....damn...sy ada buat salah lagi ke? big boss marah eh? (tpi, bukan ke dier kt *****? xkn sebok2 dgn event ada msa nk marah aku ni?)

M mate : (geleng kepala)..tak....haii..susahla bila org dh put trust ni...

me : aaaa? amendenye? xpehe...

M mate : sy baru dpt tau dr en.qwxrt, awk nk ditarik blk ke kementerian..

me : (wide eyed ) hahhhhhhh???????!!!!!!!!!!!!! takk...saya xmintak pon!!! ni smer salah en.xzrty!!! kan sy dh ckp, haritu msa sy gi kursus tu, saya satu table dgn dierr.......

M mate : sy tau, bukan salah awak...saya tak tau lah nk cakap apa....haiiii......

me : do i have a choice?

gulpppp.......leave? me? me leaving? heckkkk....baru 1bln, 12 hari im doing my task here.....im d first M to do dis task in dis no M's land....can i simply leave? whut wud people say? whut wud d B says? and, most of all...whut wud my big boss says?erkkkkssss.....

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dat was how d news was conveyed to me....i know the real story....i know how it all happened....it all happened sumwhere in march.....d final days of marCh (refer to previous blog)...however, due to some reason, i didnt put it down in words...i refuse to...coz, i dont see anything good if i write it dowN...but i have witnesses...they were there d whole time...during both incidents..they know i m innocent.....

few hours later..i was on phone with one of d people dat i trust d most in dis world....

kak Y : alhamdulillah......akak suke kalau sarah kt kementerian....with all d stories dat u've told me....and d fact dat u have no boss there, it is gud for u dear...

me : i know akak...but, why do i feel so sad? why am i reluctant? i know dis is gud...but y am i feeling sad to leave dis place?

kak Y : ur feeling sad coz u've juZ got d news....and u r feeling guilty to them....that's all... i know u sarah. u nk jaga hati orang...u keep on thinking abt d others...but u have to remember to jaga ur hati first......

me : yes, true akak.....huhuuuu.......dis is hard...i cant believe im sad to leave...

kak Y : in my opinion, there r only two reasons y ur feeling like dat. one, sbb ur feeling guilty with them and scared, and two, because u've fallen in love with dat place....SO, which is it???

gulpppp.....me? fallen in love with dis place?

few weeks ago...during a meeting to discuss dis one big event coming dis juNe...

mr.chairman : cafe 90099 ? berapa lama show dier nk bagi kita?

mr. mnjhk : ermm....kalau ikot ****, RM ****

mr.chairman : cik sarah, have u been to cafe 90099 ?

me : (gulp)errr....errr.... tak pernah...

director p : alhamdulillah..

and then, there was burst of laughter...and i cud feel my face turning red...eh, salah ke?bukan hardrock cafe tu yg mcm ada org wat persembahan2 tu ke? apasalahnya kalo x prnah mkan kt situ? ehh....am i weird?

mr. chairman : cik 78783, nnt bwak cik sarah kita ke situ..

huhuuuuu...sedih nyee....but i still kept my head high....i dont see why shud i feel ashame for dat...biarlaa...

when d meeting ends...

mr. mnjhk : so....cik sarah, bile kta nk gi cafe 90099 ?

dalam hati, nk je aku cekik mamat ni......

haiiiiii.......sabo jeleee......truth is, if the real reason they want me to go there to get extra budget for dis event....i wud b more than happy to slash it down....with the reason : MAKSIAT....hheheeee...but, of course i wudnt do dat..... when i talked to my close friends regarding to dis mater, alhamdulillah....they gave me d same answer...so whut if xpernah gi situ?

hmmmm...truth is, i really dont know which is d best....seriously, ALL my close friends wants me to go..wants me to leave....maybe due to d fact dat i was so stressed out....truth is, i wud still choose to stay here rather than go back to my previous place (although i miss my previous place dearly)...

yes...i dnt deny dat i dont see any pros of staying....i can only see d cons.....but maybe d fact that i've adapted to the whole surrounding is making me saD.... now i dont mind having my lunch alone in front of d pC.... i dont have trouble with finding d right route to go back home (after numerous time of sesatness)....i dont mind buying breakfast alone.....i can recall d names of all d directors in my department & identify who r their subordinates (which i thought wud be impossible 1 month ago)...i dnt mind attending the events dat my department is organizing every month....people has stopped assuming me as a practical student...i get along fine with all my anak buah....truth is, dis 1 month was bearable bcoz of them...maybe sbb tu kot aku sedih?

me? fallen in love? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm???

haiii.....nnt nak kena go through all over it again...adapting to a new place affects ur psychology.....huhuu...

whutever it is, im thankful to Allah.....i prayed to Allah to put me in d best place..i let Him chose....if dis is ketentuan Allah.....aku redha.....berserah dan bertawakal.......

complicated....

sigh.....
haiiiii....letih la mcm ni......shud i write down all d words on my mind? am i going to be in trouble? hmmm......

i know d implications dat i might face when i was there....at first, i thought dat its juz gonna be an awkward situation...a place where M is d minority.....and the remaining of it would be conquered by other scheme... i thought i know how it was going to be...i heard rumours....i heard news..i heard experiences frm other friends.....and i thought, whut the heck....im here...juz follow d flow, rite? as long as i did nothing wrong, insya Allah...everything wud be allrite.... plus, im holding onto d words of my PPK back during d years when i was in my 6 month course sumwhere in kiara...he said "pandai-pandailah bawak diri, tapi, jangan nak MEMANDAI-MANDAI"..... well, as long as we know how to mingle & bawak diri, M shud be ok surviving on their own in a no M's land....

well, am i right? or m i wrong?

so, a few days after i was there...i heard bad rumours...really bad ones...ok....dis is scary...but i really thought dat it was simply a matter of B against M....kannn? insya Allah..i will do my best not to be like dat...

but, last tuesday......of all d day...i went to a place where all of d decision makers, policy adjusters met.....and, my oh my....of all d ppl dat i was destined to be sitting with, i ended up sitting with the person whom i always heard d name, but havent seen d face...

so, dis is d person...the one who triggered everything..... hmmmmmm.....looking at him, he seems like a nice person...but once he opened his mouth...makkkkk aihhhhh....wowwww......ok, lets not kutuk ppl in here...

i sat quietly, listening to him talking & gossiping.....i heard it all, believe me, it was quite hard sumtimes, to separate his voice frm d facilitator's voice....i prefer to listen to d facilitator, coz, i dont want to be in trouble when my big boss wants me to explain to her later....but, i cant help but noticing dat there were times d name of my current department was being raised, and it was always abt negative things..is it juz me? or my department is problematic? well, i paid no attention whutsoever....plus, he doesnt seem to acknowledge me at all (which is kinda weird for me, coz, all M will eventually talk to each other....with the favorite question "batch mana?")..

2nd day....
him : berhati2 yer kat ctu
me : berhati2? dengan saper?
him : haii...berhati2 je lah

3rd day.........
after one day sitting in d same table, i heard more things....and, on d third day, he said
him : jaga2 la kat situ.... abcd(bukan nama sebenar) tu, tikam dari belakang, ok...
me : haaaa? abcd? dier tikam dr belakang? nmpk baik je?
him : lagi satu, nama dier pqrs(bkn nama sebenar) pon sama....
me : ternganga..

ini sudah beratt......apa aku nk buat ni?sighhhhhhhh... im in a very2 complicated situation....Ya ALLAH....kepada Mu aku mengadu....Bantulah hambamu..Lindungilah aku daripada dianiayai....Hanya kepada Engkau aku berserah....Sesungguhnya, hanya Engkau tempatku berlindung..amin....

d sculpted work culture

its already 2.43pm, friday..sumwhere on 33th floor.....in one of d buildings located sumwhere in d heart of kL...

as i was pacing back & forth looking for one of my anak buah...i sat down and think abt all the preparations needed for my first ever meeting regarding to dis finance thingy (sorry, had to b discreet). when suddenly, i juz realised....damn....dat meeting is in another 1 week...not dis monday as i thought....today is 11th, not 18th!

kenapa jadi mcm ni?

yes, i did get d date from d senior officer who advised me to do d meeting on 22nd. and yes, i know 22nd is monday....but, i thought dis coming monday is 22nd. and, because i will only have dat particular monday to settle d meeting & prepare feedbacks for my deputy dg (tuesday-cuti, wed-friday kursus), i was quite tensed.

truth is, i shudnt. and, d ugly truth is, im preparing all of d contigency plans for almost everything dat might backfire on monday.

sumtimes, i wonder, did my previous place really had sculpt me to be d person i m now? im very2 sure, a normal person wudnt accept the fact that u have to conduct a meeting, with a 1 day notice....im sure, a normal person wud choose d best time for dat meeting to take place...

but, the way i was sculpted, NO. u work on dateline. u have one date. u work towards it. and dat's why, when i thought i only have 1 day to prepare everything for d meeting, i was relatively calm & my mind was thinking how to get through it.

and, now, when i found out dat d meeting is set in 1week;s time, im quite worried... in my opinion, its too late. but, i dont know whether i shud raise my concern or not. if i raise it, im afraid, people might say, "aper minah ni, dh le baru, nk paksa2 orang pulak". but, if i dont raise it, it might turn out "lembapnyer minah ni wat keje".

warghhhh...., ke culture kt sini mmg bkn mcm tu?

a previous discussion with d senior officer...

me : owh, kta boleh reduce kpi kiter? i mean, lower down d level? boleh ke? xpe ke?

senior officer : buat apa kita janji utk benda yg kita tak mampu buat?

me : ooo....ok2. (kalau kat tmpt lama aku, ko bg jawapan mcm ni mmg nk kena la)

truth is, i dont know whether to stick to my current sculpt, or, change with d current situation...in my previous office, u think hard, beat the impposibilities....bnda plg last minit pun boleh. hari rabu petang suddenly decide nk wat retreat kt melaka on friday d same week...proceed!

hari rabu petang inform kna wat paper utk mesyuarat pengarah2 on jumaat, and d meeting is held in johor (which means, kna siap sebelum jumaat), proceed!

im sooooo used to ad-hocs situation, it has sculpted me to always respond on time to almost all d task given. (bukan nk bangga diri). truth is, i dont know whether dat is a gud thing or not...

when ur in a workplace where adhocs is normal, slow pace, sometimes, might drive u crazy.. but, u cannot force ur anak buah to work like u. ke aku ni dh jadi workaholic sebenarnya?

ke, sebenarnya, tmpt lama aku tu yg sgt2 xorganize?